improve your dating game

What happens when people think dating sucks? They have the wrong image of dating in their heads. Dating should  be fun, otherwise you can just stay at home, surf the web in your save dorm and have a look at porn pages to satisfy your needs. But that’s actually no real satisfaction- it’s just another lame way to waste your time.

Dates don’t suck when you pick the right spots

It’s not the dates that suck, it’s the way that the man/woman in the street thinks “what a date should be like” sucks. A date should not be something awkward where you go out, drink, ask uncomfortable questions and plan your future. A date is some time where you interact with someone else, get to know the other, talk, have fun, get some first body contact and find out if you like each other and if there is some attraction underneath.

Don’t go on dates

Yeah you heard me right, don’t go on dates. Don’t ask someone else to go on a date unless you want to have something that was not planned by nature. Nature has some natural selection processes and usually the most important process is that people are tested if they are good as a potential mate. Now for that matter it’s important to find the right person, which is done through tests and a date is like an F in that test. You already show interest and are easy to get. Where is the tension? Next please, both know it and it doesn’t work in so many cases, it’s a scary waste of time.
In case you really want to go on a date and have a coffee or dinner do it later on. Not during the first 5-10 dates. Maybe have a picnic or something, but don’t over commit yourself with too much conversation you can’t handle.

What you should do instead

Learn to have fun. Almost everyone who went on a date knows that feeling that you don’t know what you should talk about, feeling uncomfortable and just those bad thoughts “Is that supposed to feel like that?”. Step away from a regular date and how you were told it should look like.

• Start acting out of the norm, go on dates in grocery stores, look what food your potential mate buys, loads of information and conversation there.
• Take your dog for a walk, you will know if the other side likes animals very fast.
• Do sports and test out if the other is fit enough for you.

There are so many ways to test out if the person you are looking for is the right one, but questions usually are a bad way to find out. The way to go is through natural selection, which would be to share some of your usual activities with a stranger and just see how that turns out and if you enjoy the time together. In case you do that, it’s far easier to develop a connection between each other, or to find out that you don’t fit together!

Learn to live a life where you can actually share your activities. Sitting in front of a computer won’t do the trick unless the other one is a geek as well, which would probably be ok for a serial online dater.

There are so many things to make your life more interesting for yourself, learn how to make music, have some sort of interesting and intellectual hobbies, join some interesting clubs you can take people to. There are so many interesting things to do in life and in case you already have great hobbies you should not try to hide them and be someone else by going on fake dates. Let natural selection take place and just find someone that is really interested in you and that you are interested in, fake dates and conversation show only parts of ourselves, for example it’s pretty hard to fake love for dogs when you go out with one. It’s true that there usually is someone out there for everyone, the problem is when you act like everyone else your true self does not shine through and just some fake gossip will end up in dates that suck.

Take responsibility

It’s up to you! Don’t say dates suck, because the society taught you the wrong way to act with some strange movies that tell stories that are nice stories, but far away from reality. It’s far more important to have a great time and enjoy your life, don’t let dates be a waste of time, make them a great tool for your relationships.