learn to have a great date with killer-dating.com

What happens when people think dating sucks? They have the wrong image of dating in their heads. Dating should  be fun, otherwise you can just stay at home, surf the web in your save dorm and have a look at porn pages to satisfy your needs. But that’s actually no real satisfaction- it’s just another lame way to waste your time.

Dates don’t suck when you pick the right spots

It’s not the dates that suck, it’s the way that the man/woman in the street thinks “what a date should be like” sucks. A date should not be something awkward where you go out, drink, ask uncomfortable questions and plan your future. A date is some time where you interact with someone else, get to know the other, talk, have fun, get some first body contact and find out if you like each other and if there is some attraction underneath.

Don’t go on dates

Yeah you heard me right, don’t go on dates. Don’t ask someone else to go on a date unless you want to have something that was not planned by nature. Nature has some natural selection processes and usually the most important process is that people are tested if they are good as a potential mate. Now for that matter it’s important to find the right person, which is done through tests and a date is like an F in that test. You already show interest and are easy to get. Where is the tension? Next please, both know it and it doesn’t work in so many cases, it’s a scary waste of time.
In case you really want to go on a date and have a coffee or dinner do it later on. Not during the first 5-10 dates. Maybe have a picnic or something, but don’t over commit yourself with too much conversation you can’t handle.

What you should do instead

Learn to have fun. Almost everyone who went on a date knows that feeling that you don’t know what you should talk about, feeling uncomfortable and just those bad thoughts “Is that supposed to feel like that?”. Step away from a regular date and how you were told it should look like.

• Start acting out of the norm, go on dates in grocery stores, look what food your potential mate buys, loads of information and conversation there.
• Take your dog for a walk, you will know if the other side likes animals very fast.
• Do sports and test out if the other is fit enough for you.

There are so many ways to test out if the person you are looking for is the right one, but questions usually are a bad way to find out. The way to go is through natural selection, which would be to share some of your usual activities with a stranger and just see how that turns out and if you enjoy the time together. In case you do that, it’s far easier to develop a connection between each other, or to find out that you don’t fit together!

Learn to live a life where you can actually share your activities. Sitting in front of a computer won’t do the trick unless the other one is a geek as well, which would probably be ok for a serial online dater.

There are so many things to make your life more interesting for yourself, learn how to make music, have some sort of interesting and intellectual hobbies, join some interesting clubs you can take people to. There are so many interesting things to do in life and in case you already have great hobbies you should not try to hide them and be someone else by going on fake dates. Let natural selection take place and just find someone that is really interested in you and that you are interested in, fake dates and conversation show only parts of ourselves, for example it’s pretty hard to fake love for dogs when you go out with one. It’s true that there usually is someone out there for everyone, the problem is when you act like everyone else your true self does not shine through and just some fake gossip will end up in dates that suck.

Take responsibility

It’s up to you! Don’t say dates suck, because the society taught you the wrong way to act with some strange movies that tell stories that are nice stories, but far away from reality. It’s far more important to have a great time and enjoy your life, don’t let dates be a waste of time, make them a great tool for your relationships.

Short amount of time

This is the uber thing to have when you meet for the first time at your place. Hop in, get something and hop out. It will make it far easier to get back to your place at a later time. Most people will try to get their date into their place and keep it prison, don’t be that guy.

Music

You want to have some good music at your place, music that you like and that shows your character. You should not bent yourself and so you have to really ask yourself if you want to date someone who is into Techno when you listen to Heavy Metal.

Food

Good food shows you know how to take care of yourself. It’s a great way to end meet and cook something together or for the other one. Some high quality chocolate or healthy and easy consumable fruits like grapes are must haves.

Pictures at the wall

Pictures, with frames or on canvas should that you actually managed to move out of childhood into adulthood. In case you can’t throw away your old poster, frame them! You don’t have to live in a dark cave to show you are an alpha male, develop some style!

Open Curtains

Open curtains are a must have when you are first meeting at your place. DON’T close the curtains and light candles, try to get together at daylight and leave your home as soon as possible. You might get back to it at a later time, but you should not show that you would love to pull the other one into your bedroom, give it some time and those will close naturally.

Books

We here at Killer-Dating love books, so this is an easy one for us, books show that you broaden your horizon and have value. Don’t come across like a dork, but show that you are interested in different topics.

Good lighting

Good light is related to the open curtains, but you should have some great light for the time when those curtains are closed! Candles are great, you can get them for cheap at big Swedish warehouses or you have some nice mood lights. It will help to evolve the date.

Toys / Games

Toys or games are great, but you should only have a few of those. There is a lot of fun involved in playing with things. Games are great to lighten up the date, toys are something to mess around with. You can always say that you had a surprise visit of someone with a child and they forgot those toys right here.

Camera or pictures

Show some skills, you can always say you are a photographer and take a few pictures or show a few pictures and in case you have a digital camera you can alter those pictures and draw a moustache on it

Pen & Paper

Pen and Paper is great to start drawing something. Having our origins in the creative industries we love to create something and found out that it’s a great way to connect with people. Just start with a few lines and the other one continues the image. Or you could have some crayons and a color book, that your nephew forgot at your place and you could have some fun with those.

Most men are focused on finding a date during the nightlife, but the question is what do you expect to find there? During the nightlife almost everyone wants to have a party and a good time. Drinks are flowing, the music is loud and the atmosphere sparkling, why shouldn’t you go on date hunt here? Because, every woman who goes out at night expects to be approached by some guy, who is probably drunk and unless he is very good looking or got plenty of Game he will probably be rejected. It’s great to have a fun time and party, and you might end up with a girl on your side, but you have to work hard for it. There are better places to start at.

The setting

Let’s look at an average grocery store, you find everything there that already qualifies someone else for a date. You have the healthy foods, you have, depending on your country a liquor area, the fast food, clothes, electronics, magazines, just about everything that can be fun and entertaining. The great part is, you can just go there when you need and if you see someone interesting you can start a conversation.

How to approach

There are many ways to start a conversation, you can for example try to use quotes from famous persons, or you go somewhere and ask for an honest opinion about a product you want to pick. Try to find something easy and light and start from there.

Examples:

• “Hi, I have to ask you for a female opinion, we have this party later and need a few snack, what would you recommend.” In case you get some sort of connection, exchange a few words and have a fun time you can just say, “Well, I gotta go, but you look like fun hanging around with! You should give me your number/email so we can have a cup of tea and chat!” Off you go, and the next day you can send an email with how great that party went and how the snack tip turned out. Just a short mail, maybe 3-5 lines and off you go, add two dates with something you do at a public place where she can join you.
• You slightly bump into their shoppingcart and tell her it is her fault, in a funny and playful way and try to emerge a conversation from that point. Try to offer an agility course when you do whatever sport you do later that day and offer her to join, or simply ask for her email.
• Pick something from the shelves and make involve it in the conversation. Just make sure you make it playful and funny. You don’t want to project a psycho image.

The next steps

The grocery store is just a great place to meet women and you should try to get some conversation started and spark enough emotional connection that you can just get that email, or go for a coffee after the shopping tour, because you need a break. Everything should be playful, fun and you should have a great time. You don’t have to spend a fortune to meet women, there is a pretty good chance that you will find someone interesting around the corner.

Dating itself is pretty self explaining, but to understand the value it has for today’s society you have to take a look at the whole industry behind it. People want to make money with teaching men how to meet women and women how to get the man of their dreams. The question that pops up is, does this make this industry bad?

NOPE! It sure hell doesn’t do that. The dating industry is good, due to the many men that don’t know how to interact with women and have to learn it step by step.

The modern man should take it like Bruce Lee and ‘Absorb what is useful’. There usually is not one method that works for everyone and the only way to learn is to read, act and make mistakes. Unless you don’t make mistakes you can’t learn. Dating is more of an inner game with yourself than what other people think. You have to learn to play with your mind and to lose the fear of approaching and rejection, learn how you can manipulate yourself into a better way of living and the most important part how to lead an interesting and fun life that you can be proud of. Just do what makes you happy and the positive vibrations will carry over on others. You just have to learn that like most everyday activities learning with books or a coach creates a better learning curve and will lead to a quicker mastery of whatever you want to become.

Leaning how to judge the offers presented to you is a key lesson in life management. There are people who want to do you good, like to teach and see others succeed and then there is the other kind, the people who like to see their pockets fattend by your money. Don’t throw away your hard earned cash at people who don’t know what they are talking about. The first step towards mastering dating and relationships is to master your life, and that won’t happen if you go on 10.000 dates.

The key questions to ask yourself in case you are thinking about joining a program are…

… do those people offer free material?

… can I get my money back?

… how good is their reputation?

… do they offer live coaching?

… are there forums around that could help me improve?

… are there free resources that offer the same amount?

… how much am I willing to pay to master this issue in my life?

… how much am I willing to change my behavoir?

… do I look for a solution of a problem that is rooted somewhere else, can I improve myself first?

… do I know real people who could help me out and show me how to improve? Do I have friends who are skilled in this matter that could help me?

… people who are out there to help others want some money for their time, but their mission is to help and you can see that through their actions and the reactions of the community!

Sometimes we all make mistakes, but those mistakes will usually lead to a date that you rather want to forget than remember. Just jump over your evil shadow and let those 5 mistakes behind.

Lower your own value

This mistake will cost you everything. You go out and have fun and then you start talking like you don’t deserve the date and show how lucky you are to get that date.
Don’t do that. It’s important to realize that dating is an everyday activity performed by millions of people everyday. It’s nothing special. It should be fun, and you should know that you are a great catch. Smart, fun to hang around with and that the other side should be happy do be on a date with you.

Talk about negative things

Try to talk about fun things. In case some relatives passed away and you feel miserable, just don’t go for dating. People want to have fun or some stimulating conversation when they go out. Something to get their minds and body work. Negative will connect the date with negative feeling and you usually don’t want that to happen.

Ask stupid questions like: What kind of guys do you usually date?

Seriously, you are on a date with her, why would you care about the past or what she is into? You are sitting there, don’t try to get away and show what a weak boy you are. Be proud of yourself and have fun.

Have bad breath

No excuse for that. Ever got closer and thought that the other person must have eaten a seven weak old cat for lunch and you put all your self control into action to suppress the upcoming vomit. Don’t be that guy.

Being boring

It’s tough to teach someone not to be boring, but being boring is just one of those things that will kill a date. On a killer date you will have plenty of fun and want to remember it for the next few weeks as one of the best experiences you had. Learn to connect positive feelings and an emotional connection, but be yourself, don’t turn into a weak and sloppy yes-sayer. It’s great when people want to spend time with you.